Sometimes thank you is a four letter word--[bitter]

May 18



Thank you for neglecting me, for taking me for granted

for not writing, not calling

for leaving me waiting in silence, apparently forgotten

for not giving me the care and attention everyone else seems to deserve

Then coming home, expecting me to crawl into your lap like a cat, and tell you I love you.

Thank you for making me feel that I deserve this special treatment.


Thank you for giving me no choice but to forget about you, to abjure you, to shun you

At the time I didn't realize that when you gave me no choice, I didn't need one.

Thank you for teaching me the error of my ways.


Thank you for essentially disappearing

Before I got too hurt, too close

Before I gave you gifts belonging to someone else

Before I wasted too much time.


I know that just writing this empowers you, gives you attention, immortalizes you in some way

But I felt that it is much crueler to say this behind your back than to your face

So I put it here, out in plain sight

where you will never find it

because you won't bother looking.


Funny how I was so much smarter at 19,

knowing then what has taken me all these years to learn.


Thank you.